Calendar Girl Blog: With Man, Without Man
During periods of singledom which I label, Without Man, I have found the task of defending my breast and bodies honour to be a full time job. Without Man, (I cannot speak to same sex relationships here but would love to know if there is a common thread) I have intentionally avoided situations and people...male people....when I know I'll be hit on.
Thanks to taking the clever Myers-Brigg's test, 10 years ago, I learned, much to my surprise, that I am a 50/50 introvert/extrovert split.
My introverted side is relatively easy to live with. I stay on my property, amuse myself, avoid contact with others. Sometimes I get a bit concerned if my outside voice gets used too frequently despite being alone and I start thinking about getting a bunch of cats. Otherwise being introverted is fairly safe.
When my extroverted side kicks into gear, we have another story.
I'm friendly, funny and free. My big smile flashes good straight teeth. I know how to fire up a smart, witty conversation. I exude energy. I draw attention.
Being introverted Without Man, requires nothing difficult from me. Flip into extrovert, and suddenly, I end up feeling quite vulnerable if I let myself fully engage with other men. The type of attention I get is not always the type of attention I am seeking.
With Man is a different story. With Man, my introvert gets cramped and stuffed up. It's like I'm having an allergic reaction to a human being. Turn me on my extrovert side and look out mamma. With Man I suddenly feel safe, sure and ready to take on the world.
Now why would that be I wonder....
Could it be that I'm counting on My Man to protect me from other men's unwanted sexual penetration?
Bingo baby.
Just by virtue of having a man, even just being able to refer to his existence, has the profound effect of getting overly zealous men to back off.
No means no With Man. Without Man, no looses its meaning.
Calendar Girl does want control of her breasts and body. Yet, she's also looking for protection so that she can be herself. She wonders where this dichotomy fits into the big picture of understanding women's breast health needs?
Calendar Girl
Tags: Calendar Girl Blog, Breast of Canada Calendar, Myers-Briggs, breasts.
Thanks to taking the clever Myers-Brigg's test, 10 years ago, I learned, much to my surprise, that I am a 50/50 introvert/extrovert split.
My introverted side is relatively easy to live with. I stay on my property, amuse myself, avoid contact with others. Sometimes I get a bit concerned if my outside voice gets used too frequently despite being alone and I start thinking about getting a bunch of cats. Otherwise being introverted is fairly safe.
When my extroverted side kicks into gear, we have another story.
I'm friendly, funny and free. My big smile flashes good straight teeth. I know how to fire up a smart, witty conversation. I exude energy. I draw attention.
Being introverted Without Man, requires nothing difficult from me. Flip into extrovert, and suddenly, I end up feeling quite vulnerable if I let myself fully engage with other men. The type of attention I get is not always the type of attention I am seeking.
With Man is a different story. With Man, my introvert gets cramped and stuffed up. It's like I'm having an allergic reaction to a human being. Turn me on my extrovert side and look out mamma. With Man I suddenly feel safe, sure and ready to take on the world.
Now why would that be I wonder....
Could it be that I'm counting on My Man to protect me from other men's unwanted sexual penetration?
Bingo baby.
Just by virtue of having a man, even just being able to refer to his existence, has the profound effect of getting overly zealous men to back off.
No means no With Man. Without Man, no looses its meaning.
Calendar Girl does want control of her breasts and body. Yet, she's also looking for protection so that she can be herself. She wonders where this dichotomy fits into the big picture of understanding women's breast health needs?
Calendar Girl
Tags: Calendar Girl Blog, Breast of Canada Calendar, Myers-Briggs, breasts.
posted by Sue Richards at 10:59 AM
2 Comments:
A wonderful post Sue. Every man should read this.
The more I enter into it, the more I am convinced that dialogue like this can be a powerful agent for change.
My view of women's bodies has certainly changed since I've started my blog. I quite often look at women now in a self quizical way. "What am I looking at? Why am I finding that interesting? I hope my glance and smile is appreciated?"
Hey, I think this is getting longer than a comment, but you get the picture.
Thanks for you blog. I read it every day whenever I can and you always have something thought provoking to say.
Chris
Chris,
Could it be that the written word is easier to understand than the spoken? I'm referring to me sharing these observations in my blog without blaming men and you being able to take them in without getting defensive.
Calendar Girl
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